Picture 54: Chariots of Fire (1981)

It is not since 1967 that any movie has scored less than 6/10. Maybe it will be plain sailing for Hollywood from here. Produced by Dodi Fayed, Chariots of Fire grossed 59 million dollars worldwide and won four Academy Awards. Will Chariots sprint to the top of the table?

We follow the trials and tribulations of two British athletes competing at the 1924 Olympics in Paris. Eric Liddle (Ian Charleson) is a Christian whilst Harold Abrahams (Ben Cross) is Jewish. Liddle doesn’t want to race on Sundays whilst Abrahams faces antisemitism and institutional challenges.

The story, despite honourable intention, struggles to generate any meaningful intrigue and is mixed with ghastly cultural appropriation of the English, French and Japanese. Be prepared for young people dressing up as old people and the most bizarre sprinting techniques ever seen. Why does every competitor feel the need to thrust their head back and open their mouths for the final 30 metres of the race? Is this method acting? Whatever it is – it’s bizarre, an inefficient use of energy and unsettling to watch.

There are at least some Easter eggs amongst the unfolding clouds. Watch out for Ian Holm who is 20 years pre-Bilbo Baggins and Abrahams’ personal trainer. Ian just about manages to hold it together despite his inconsistent accent. John Gielgud plays himself as a Cambridge college master whilst there’s also a young Stephen Fry and Kenneth Branagh in the mix. These serve only as mitigating factors in an otherwise challenging 2 hours.

Chariots rightfully belongs towards the bottom of this list and lands in a well-deserved 47th place. Just watch the opening scene of the athletes running along the beach to Vangelis’ electronica in Broadstairs and you will have experienced all that is necessary. It’s essentially a downhill jog after that and a struggle to watch. It’s hard to make a good film about running and this picture is a perfect historical specimen of that fact. It just hasn’t aged well old chaps. 

Bring me my spear to burst this blog’s bubble.

Rating: 5/10

Oscar Best Picture Rankings:

1. The Godfather (1972)

2. Casablanca (1943)

3. The Apartment (1960)

4. Rebecca (1940)

5. The Godfather: Part II (1974)

6. The Sound of Music (1965)

7. Ordinary People (1980)

8. The Deer Hunter (1978)

9. A Man for All Seasons (1966)

10. Lawrence of Arabia (1962)

11. Ben-Hur (1959)

12. Lost Weekend (1945)

13. Rocky (1976)

14. Annie Hall (1977)

15. All About Eve (1950)

16. One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest (1975)

17. Hamlet (1948)

18. How Green Was My Valley (1941)

19. Gone With the Wind (1939)

20. West Side Story (1961)

21. Mrs. Miniver (1942)

22. All Quiet on the Western Front (1930)

23. Wings (1928)

24. Mutiny on the Bounty (1935)

25. You can’t take it with you (1938)

26. Patton (1970)

27. The Best Years of Our Lives (1946)

28. On the Waterfront (1954)

29. The Bridge on the River Kwai (1957)

30. Midnight Cowboy (1969)

31. Kramer vs. Kramer (1979)

32. Marty (1955)

33. Oliver! (1968)

34. Cimarron (1931)

35. Grand Hotel (1932)

36. The French Connection (1971)

37. An American in Paris (1951)

38. From Here to Eternity (1953)

39. It Happened One Night (1934)

40. My Fair Lady (1964)

41. Gentleman’s Agreement (1947)

42. Cavalcade (1933)

43. The Sting (1973)

44. The Life of Emile Zola (1937)

45. Going My Way (1944)

46. The Great Ziegfeld (1936)

47. Chariots of Fire (1981)

48. All the King’s Men (1949)

49. In the Heat of the Night (1967)

50. Gigi (1958)

51. Around the World in 80 Days (1956)

52. The Greatest Show on Earth (1952)

53. The Broadway Melody (1929)

54. Tom Jones (1963)

Previous or current ranking leaders are in bold.

With credit and thanks to the patrons of the Best Picture Film Club:

Dr Sophie Bloomfield – Fashion Correspondent

Dr Caspar Briault – Head of Cynicism

Dr Conrad Charlton

Dr Kate Diomede

Dr Fionnuala Durrant

Dr Josh Fisher

Dr Joseph Gallaher – CEO and Founder

Dr Joseph Hamilton

Dr Adam Holland

Dr Sid Mohan - Divisional Lead for the 1980s

Dr Hannah Morrison

Dr Meera Radia